le artist

I painted tonight. It was the first time I've painted in about 6 years. I'm not a painter or anything, but it was so great to move the acrylic around the canvas with my brush. I felt like I could have kept painting all night.

me and my coworkers

THE POWER HOUSE TEAM!!!

time to grow

I recently got some constructive criticism from a guy at work. As a preface, its really nice when someone takes sincere time to give this type of guidance because I know the easier thing is to not take the time to really say what you think.
I wrote a business plan to propose a change in the structure of our dept. He said that he thought it could have been a lot better given what he knows about what I really think and how intelligent and articulate I really am. He gave me really good suggestions on how I can make it better mostly having to do with structuring and format. Its good for me to know because i really have never learned that kind of stuff, so it would make sense that I have a lot to learn, and that should be exciting that i simply don't know and not that I suck but it still tapped into my insecurities of feeling like I'm not good enough and I don't have what "it" takes to make it. I want to think of myself as teachable and eager to learn, but as he was telling me i had to focus extra hard, telling myself, "be open. be receptive. don't let your ego get in the way." I guess I' happy to learn and be open about the things I want to, but lord help me if someone shines a lite on weaknesses of mine for me.


Well, its already several days later and I'm happy with how I've handled it. I am really putting my best foot forward and trying to learn more about this. I'm also feeling grateful to this guy for his gentle butt-kicking. It worked. Sometimes its the gentle push we didn't even know we needed.

Worthwhile interntet leisure time

My friend Meighan, who I feel like I've known since 7th grade, is why the Internet is great. She is unabashedly an evangelist of all things creative, fun, and beautiful. She scours the city and web for these beautiful things and collects them and adds commentary on all these treasures. You can check out her blog by clicking here. Its worth going back to on the regular.

Here she is

Look how happy i look.
She did it. That's amy.

The Resurrection of Pepe and how we rode into the sunset...

Three days, one tiring walk to the mechanic where I had to walk Pepe about two miles to the garage and 40 shekels ($10) later, Pepe has been resurrected to his normal smoke-sputtering self. The problem was one starter plug which the mechanic found, fixed and replaced in about seven minutes. It was such a relief to have it be something so simple and I felt so liberated once again having transportation.

The intervening days I'd been forced to take public transportation. The truth is I don't mind public transit at all, and I'm very glad its there. Its just that there are certain times I really need a vehicle, such as for surfing.

So, I celebrated this miraculous resurrection and return to freedom of mobility by getting into my wetsuit as if I were Clark Kent getting into a phone booth and heading to the ocean to surf into the sunset. Literally. I actually surfed well past the sunset and into the dark. It was really exciting. On a side note, I'm loving surfing these days and totally hooked. I recently progressed to a whole new level and its making every session so enjoyable.

the death of Pepe

This Jeremy blog entry is one that must begin on a sad note. Pepe la Moto is my beautiful blue scooter that I bought from my good friend Dena Scher. I've had Pepe nearly the entire time I've been in Israel I've made multiple voyages on him nearly every day I've been here over these last two and one half years. Effectively, next to Shimshon, he is perhaps my most enduring friend here in the holy land. Sadly this last shabat, pepe sputtered out a frightful fit of words that went from the familiar machine gun like, "wan-wan-wan-weeee-wan-wan-weee-weeewan-wan-wan-" and grumbled down to a, "waah-waah-whaah-whhhoo-whhaah" before sputtering to a complete stop.

Unfortunately the estimated value of my bike is about one fifth of the last set of repairs I did on it and it doesn't seem worth it to keep fixing Pepe. So, sadly, the time has come to part ways with this true and trusted companion.

Be well my friend. Thank you for a great few years.

Self portrait

This is a digital representation of my real self. Or, is it a real representation of my digital self? Recently, i think the line has become blurred and looking into the future it will only become more blurred. There are already many people that only know of me in my digital life. Web 2.0, messenger, blogs, email. I now work and socialize with so many people only as my digital representation. How much of me actually comes across? Do i like myself more in this environment that i have so much control over? Is this now the real me?

Leora's Dinner Party

Wow. I am so excited to be writing this blog and I never thought this would have happened to me. I mean, of course I'd hoped, but I didn't think I'd actually be up here. So, first of all, I really need to thank everyone that made this possible. The great guests whose interesting lives, witty conversation and healthy appetites helped to make the evening so pleasurable. Obviously I need to thank everyone who contributed all the tasty food. Amy, I'm loving you and your friends. Thank you for introducing me to such a great group of people. But most of all, thank you Leora for pulling this all together. It was a wonderful shabbat. So thank you everyone, I couldn't have done it without you.

Funny theatre

Amy and i went to see ratatouille ( i'll tell you later if i liked it because it hasn't started yet) and the theatre was really small and creepy. It has like ten rows with only five seats across and its like watching a big screen tv. The two and a half foot tall emergency exit was the funniest part of the whole thing. Amy says the room is like being in a weird spaceship.

Inspired by others

I just read an amazing interview with the guy that invented the Grameen bank. It is a micro-lending institution that has one goal. Help poor people get ahead by lending them small amounts of money for omey making endeavors. It was started by an economics professor in Bangladesh and today they currently lend to more than 7 million people, 97% of whom are women.
This is a truly inspirational story about how as individuals we can really make the world a better place.
You can read the whole interview here.

"Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb."
Sir Winston Churchill

Ugly Mickey

This is a Jeremy blog entry that just points to the great contributions on the www. Its nice to see that people can use their talents for something positive. Like on this funny website I found that lets people contribute their ugly renditions of Mickey Mouse. http://mickeyfeio.wordpress.com/

So angry

I just watched the new Micahel Moore movie, "sicko," and it evoked such a strong reaction in me. I guess he's good at what he does. I knew as i was watching it that he was spinning things to make his point, but in this case he was preaching to the choir. For those that don't know, this film is about the state of the health care system in the US and he makes his best case for a nationalized health care system by comparing the US to the UK, France, Canada and even 3rd world Cuba.
It just made me so angry to know that so many suffer such hardships mostly around lacking access to care just because of money. Its one thing if poor people in a poor country that lacks supplies and medicine all together are suffering, that is something tragic in its own right, but to see working class families that have an income but can't get the very care that is in their neighborhood because of insurance problems seems inhumane. Every doctor makes an oath to help all patients yet in the US they are prevented from fulfilling that oath because of questions of money. It really seems like the worst kind of perversion of a profession that is supposed to be so noble.

I live in a country with nationalized health care. It has its ups and downs, but it works and everyone has it. I am currently saving over $3600 per year in health care costs. Even more important than the money, my conscience feels good knowing that everyone can get care when they need it and that some insurance company can't kick someone off their policy because they couldn't make payments or they didn't list a pre-existing condition.

I wrote to my congressmen, and the presidential candidates telling them that I want this issue addressed. i consider it to be a moral issue, not a political one.

New student

Yesterday Amy (the girl) and I went surfing. She has been wanting to learn how to surf so I started to teach her. It is amazing to teach people things. I love to learn new things, especially things that are very different from something I've ever done before. I really enjoyed being part of that process with someone else. Learning to surf is not easy and can be very frustrating. It is physically exhausting and a beginner often feels so weak and inefficient before something so massive and unforgiving. Still, Amy did great. Yes, she go tossed around like a small mouse under the paw of large cat, but she came up out of the water, hair in her face, mouth and nose full of salt water, and still managed a smile (most of the time). We were sharing my board and when she got tired I would paddle out and ride a few waves in and then give the board back over. She would want to know how I made it look so easy and I just promised her that by sticking with it what seems so foreign and uncomfortable now, will gradually become part of her catalog of abilities like typing, yoga, or playing the flute.

quote of the day

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.


Oscar Wilde

When the heavens open up

I saw traces of what was probably an amazing sunset today. I only say probably because I didn't actually see the sun. I left my office to go get a snack and it looked like the sky had opened up a window to the heavens. I felt like it was the kind of place i wished i could go closer to or maybe even live in. I thought of my friend maddy in italy and wondered if she saw the same sunset. Then i had the thought that this magical gateway could be viewed as a reflection of this world and that all of the beauty and magic i was thinking was in another world was actually in this world and the sunset was just here to remind of of that.

Back to work

After two and a half grueling days of being sick, i made it back to work. Yipee! It was actually really nice to join the ranks of the living:-) I'm slowly getting an appetite back and the color is coming back to my face too. Thanks to everyone that wished me healthy thoughts.

on the road again

I'm not even sure what to say. Yesterday, September 29th I got 8 years sober. I remember whhen I had about 6 months sober I was feeling pretty disheartened and I wasn't sure this sobriety thing would be worthwhile. Mainly I wasn't sure I'd make it. I was afraid of putting myself at risk of losing a whole lot if I managed to stay sober for say, ten years. Ten years seemed a lifetime away back then and now it doesn't seem so far away at all. I was right about one thing though. It would suck to lose what I've got now.
But really, that's not why I started this blog post. I wanted to write because I started dating someone and I'm scared. It's really hard to take it slow and just enjoy the moment. I want so badly, just as I've always wanted, someone to love me, to be my salvation. There is a part of me that yearns to be loved by someone unconditionally and forever. I don't know why I crave it so much. I have it with my friends. I have it with my family. It's just nice to be chosen and to feel special. Now that I write that its nice to see it for what it is. I really do believe I have all I need and more in my life to be fully happy and whole today.
I'm going to try to let my friends and family know that I think they're special. I think it will help.

It is a happy new year

i feel great. I've been playing around with henna tattoos. I could never do it for real, but arent they cool?
I reallly like my new job. I love the city I live in. I love the apt I live in. I'm having a lot of fun in life. I bought a new surfboard after moving here to Tel Aviv and I've been surfing whenever there are decent waves. Somedays I get to go before work which is awesome. I wake up early, walk sheemy (the dog), and I jump on my scooter, Pepe La Moto, with my board on my side and drive the two minutes down to the beach. Not a bad life at all.
I wish I could say my love life has been going as well. I'm a lot more cynical and afraid of being hurt nowadays. I feel like when I was younger I was so eager to throw myself into something if it felt right. Now I don't know what to do. In someways I feel like people have gotten more complicated and women less predictable. Sadly enough, it's actually that they have become predictably unpredictable. Anyway, I just got dissapointed again. I was seeing a girl I really liked and I felt that she really liked me, and it ended so she could be confused with her ex boyfriend.
I'm going to work on a new art piece for my house and I was thinking of using the words "loving is courageous but there's no other choice"or "love like you've never been hurt."
A few exciting things worth mentioning: At the end of this month I have eight years sober (thank you god). I just bought a plane ticket to chicago for thanksgiving for our family reunion there.
I'd have to say I'm happy with this jeremy blog entry.

SURPRISE!!!

today is the 2nd to last day of work for me. I've been so anxious to go and start my new life in Tel Aviv and I don't like or deal with goodbyes that well, so I've really just been wanting it to be over here.
I've also had a nagging guilty feeling that I'm leaving my job after six months and I think I've been preogecting my shitty feelings on everyone else and then thinking that they must be mad at me.

That's why I was so surprisd when they gave me a going away party today.

They called me into the main office at about 4:30 and everyone was in there with cake and drinks. It made me uncomfortably emotional even just standing there, so when people started speaking I sort of momentarily panicked.
I said a few words though and it was actually really nice in the end and felt like a good way to have closure. It was a good reminder of how sometimes by doing things i don't want to I'll actually be happy with how I feel afterwards.

2 more days

two more days and i am done at my current job. the next morning i'm going to sign the lease for my great apt in Tel Aviv.
Once again, things are falling into place for me. It's an amazing reminder of what can happen when you go for what you want and let go of the results.
So, no more Crytec and hello The Nation Traffic Ltd.
I really have a good feeling about this new job and I'm hoping I can grow there and stay for a few years.

I miss my family and friends at home and i can't wait until the next time I visit. It will have been so long.

lost my wallet

I lost my wallet tonight. It had my Israeli identity card and a bank card and about $50 in it. I used it to buy a skateboard right before I went to the gym. I'd been thinking about this skateboard for a week now since I tried it out the first time in the store. It's a weird hybrid skateboard with only two wheels, one on each end. It's supposed to simulate a surfboard. I went and worked out after I bought it and after my workout, at dinner, I noticed it wasn't there. I didn't stress, I knew it was probably at the store or the gym. Later that night I got a call that it somone found it and my credit card, no $50 though. That's the end of my boring story.

MORE exciting is that I got two job interviews lined up for later this week!!

Times they are a changin

Well, it's another case of the I wish it were a real sunday blues, but I'm here working because thats the way we do it here in the land.
I'm a little bit in many places at once. Here in Be'er Sheva, in Jerusalem a year ago, back home after deciding to come back to the states, and in Tel Aviv settled in my new home and Job. I don't know how exactly this is all turnin out but I'm hangin on the seat of my pants to see. that is what i'm reminding myself of anyway. this is all just one big adventure.

Thrilled by Thriller

Just when you think the world can't get any better, along comes the remake to Michael Jackson's Thriller.
It's rare that a remake out does the original, but I think we have a contender here.

Last adventure and final thoughts

Well, I'm sitting in my hotel room with my bags packed. I'm only wearing a sweater, my jacket is packed away. Normally I'd never go out so lighlty dressed, but I'm off to the airport and its part of my eagerness to get back to the heat that is prompting me into temporary denial about the outside temperature.
The photos here are of downtown Reyjkavik, Iceland's largest city, home to about 120,000 people. It, like every other place in Iceland, is situated amongst amazing physical beauty. It is on the water with views of a foreboding deep blue ocean. At its back are climbing mountains and even a few glaciers. You can see these views thru cross streets even as you stroll the downtown.
The other photos here are from a drive I did from Akuryeri, in the northern and eastern side of the country back to Reykavik.
More stunning fields, mountains, ocean and glaciers. thank you iceland.
I am grateful for the beauty here, the same way I am grateful for beauty everywhere. Here there is just so much of it. I am grateful for the friends I made here, Glen, Harry, Erla, Lynn, Erik and Gustav, I hope to see you as we trudge the road to happy destiny.

oh yeah...i'm a swinger

it's amazing what you can do when you have a few minutes free time in iceland between business meetings

the blue lagoon and a year in a day

I got to go to some geothermal hot springs called the Blue lagoon. It is a HOT slufur pool that shines blue and white in the middle of a lava rock valley. when i arrived it was a sunny spring day and within minutes the weather changed dramatically. it started raining, then hailing, then snowing and then REALLY snowing. I sat in the hot waters while getting snowed on. I felt like one of those magestic monkeys you see on the nature channel covered in snow with icicles on his fur and eyebrows. They call iceland the land of fire and ice because of all the geothermal and volcanic activity. I really felt it at that moment. The experienceIt was like being on the moon because you'd look out over this surface that was sharp, jagged volcanic black rocks while you were floating in a hot milky pool. The weather is crazy here, one moment nice (15 degrees) the next it can be 2 degrees and snowing. If it weren't so beautiful, I'd be really upset. everyone here tells me i'm lucky that I get to experience all of icelandic weather in one day.

now i know iceland

What the hell? I'm in iceland. I'm in one of those places I pretty much assumed i'd never go, like mauritius. its not that I have anything against iceland or icelandic folks, and i guess i always assumed there are probably nice things there, but really! who actually goes to iceland?
apparently I do. as an ice salesmen from israel. guy from the desert selling ice-machines in iceland. it sounds like a bad script, the kind of thing you wouldn't believe unless it were true.
so, i'm staying in iceland touring the country's fishing towns. going on board fishing vessels, holding my breath thru stinky fish processing plants and sitting in lots of meetings with people that have names i can't pronounce like harladur, and thordvalsson. at least i got to meet a guy named thor.
I also have time for touristy stuff and iceland abounds with physical beauty. they call iceland a land of fire and ice. the ice part is obvious, and the fire part comes from the fact that iceland is basically an island of volcanos. the entire island is covered with volcanos, some recently active, and lots of lava flow. that means that some places are virtually un crossable mile after square mile of really jagged rock that no tank or 4wd could come close to traversing.